12.29.2012

Holiday Sadness

In general, my holiday time with family was a pretty wonderful time.  Lots of fun and food and laughing until we fell over and couldn't laugh any more.  (thank you old home videos!)  We will be adding three new family members to our numbers this summer when my brother remarries and it was a special time of getting to know my two new nieces-to-be and a new sis-in-law a bit better as well.

However, my heart still touches a sad note.  My last remaining grandparent; my maternal Grandma, is declining both in body and mind.  Her last hours at our gathering were spent in a fog of delusion.

I have to admit that I wish there was a better way to exit this world.  It seems to hold nothing but pain and heaviness of heart and tragedy for many.  I would want better for my Grandma than what life is holding for her at this point. 

I guess that the lesson is to cherish the "living years", make the most of the time you have... the Princess asked me a rather simple but deep question when we were watching those home videos I posted about earlier.  There was more to it; but the gist of what she was asking was, "If the Young You could see the Now You (thank you, Princess, for not saying "Old You"...lol) what would she think or say? 

Interesting.

3 comments:

Craig said...

Poignant; thank you for this.

The last of my grandparents died 20 years ago (hmmmm. . . when I was about your age. . .), and in more recent years, we've begun saying goodbye to our parents. Next, I suppose, our kids will be saying goodbye to us. . .

That's a pretty profound question yer daughter asked, right there. I've occasionally wondered the same thing myself. If the 'Now Me' met the 'Young Me', I wonder what we'd think of each other? Would either of us be disappointed by the other one? Would the 'Wiser, More Experienced Me' have any advice for my younger self? Fascinating to ponder. . .

Bijoux said...

I'm sorry for your loss. I'm thinking about doing a grandparent blog series next year. Good memories that I want to get down in writing before I forget. Cuz I'm getting old now!

Anonymous said...

if the young me met the old me?

"Seriously dude, I mean, just, good grief!!"

memories can be precious yet they can cause grief when related to a declining relative. Like Craig, it's been a few years since I had grandparents and I regret to say that the Summit legacy is, well, not full of precious moments when it comes to that generation. One can only hope that family legacy can be improved upon, eh?